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February 3, 2025

How to Talk to Parents About Assisted Living

While it may not be a conversation you’re looking forward to, talking with your parents about their senior living options can be the beginning of a new and fulfilling chapter in your family’s life. That’s because today’s best independent and assisted living communities are designed to allow older adults to try new things, socialize, learn, and enjoy life. 

That’s the message you’ll want to get across during your conversation — and to do so you’ll want to be prepared and knowledgeable about all of your parents’ options for senior living.  

Research Living Options for Seniors in Your Area

The thought of moving can be difficult for many. That’s why — even if you’re early on in the conversation — you’ll want to paint a vivid picture for your parents of what the future could be like.

Spend time researching senior living communities in your area to find out the following:

• What living options are offered? Is there assisted living? How about skilled nursing or memory care if it may be needed in the future?

• What would your parents’ new home be like? How many square feet? Is there any shared outdoor space?

• What are the dining options? Is there a variety? Are dieticians available to assist residents?

• What services and amenities are available? Is there an opportunity to pursue hobbies like gardening? Is there an on-site salon?

• What activities are offered?

• What is the cost? Is there an upfront fee? Is the pricing inclusive? 

• Is there a waiting list?

• What do the communal areas and grounds look like?

Action Item: Bring a tablet or laptop to your discussion with your parents and show them pictures of some senior living communities you’ve found that you think they would like. 

Evaluate Your Parents’ Needs

There are several levels of care available at most senior living communities, ranging from independent and assisted living to memory care and skilled nursing. Taking an honest look at your parents’ needs will help you — as a family — determine the best option for them. 

Action Item: Read this article on how to distinguish if your loved one is ready for assisted living.

Make a List of Conversation Starters

Difficult conversations often need a boost to get started and keep going. Rather than simply asking your parents if they’d like to move, be prepared with questions intended to get them thinking about the positives that could come with a new home, including:

  • Has maintaining a home and yard become challenging?
  • Would having less to worry about make their lives less stressful and more enjoyable?
  • Would they exercise, socialize, or get out more if they didn’t have to worry about driving?
  • Is it refreshing to think about not cooking or cleaning every day?
  • Is it becoming difficult to help each other when recovering from an illness or procedure?

Action Item: Give all of the above some thought and prepare a list of questions to bring with you to your discussion with your parents.  

Set the Right Tone for Your Discussion

Plan on having your discussion at a time and in a place where there are minimal distractions and everyone is feeling rested and comfortable. Visualize the tone you will take and try to be empathetic but also realistic. Realize that this is likely only the start to a conversation and strive to remain patient. Don’t pressure your parents to make an immediate decision. Give them time to take in all of the information on senior living options you’ve given them. Take notes so that you can follow up on any questions your parents may have.

Action Item: Commit to silencing your cell phone when you meet with your parents so that you can give them your full attention.

Follow up by Arranging Visits to a Few of the Best Senior Living Options in Your Area

Once you’ve given your parents some time, follow up with an offer to arrange a visit to a few of the senior living options they liked the most. The best communities will happily coordinate a visit, complete with time to chat with residents and perhaps even enjoy a meal. 

Action Item: Check out the websites — especially the community events section — of the places you’ll be visiting so that you have more information to share with your parents on the drive there.

What Life Looks Like at Springpoint Living at Manalapan

From therapeutic gardening and guided meditation to fitness classes and social gatherings, Springpoint Living at Manalapan offers activities to enrich each day, celebrate shared experiences, and foster friendships. Take a look at what an average day has to offer or, better yet, schedule a visit to see our Manalapan, New Jersey, campus for yourself. 

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